What are the answers?

Last night as I sat watching Sex and The City, I thought about what Carrie Bradshaw said about how she or Miranda couldnt figure out men. That put me on the thought trail that could I figure out men? And then I went down the memory lane...
I always played with boys and was a tom boy myself. I always felt that no man can ever fancy me.. Because I was not so attractive.. Well but now after being on the wrong side of 25 I think there are other problems. Three disastrous relationships later. I dont know if I always made the wrong choice or was it just a hasty mistake.
The first guy I fell in love with was a man of very limited ability of flooring some dumb people (who had massive self doubts). He believed that hard work might kill.. The second guy ,who I was all keen to get married to ,was a bigger loser. No, he was not dumb but was just a weak character who earned a lot of money and lost himself to money and women easily available.. If yu are already horrified. There is more to come.
In my heart broken state I met an another 'not a super achiever' ... well he was a sob. Who had just given up with the world and its people ...... Thinking ... I then I met the biggest loser of them all. He was a spoilt child. You could easily be decieved by his outward calm. Well he wanted all great to happen to him and would not listen to anyone at all. He abused me mentally ,physically and emotionally. Its taken me an year to recover some what but have I still totally recovered?
The time has come when I should finally walk the aisle... And I am full of self doubt.... Do I have the judgement to find the right man? Have I made all my mistake and I am ready to know all the rights for me? Or is there ever a right? Arent we all full of our rights and wrongs .. and its just the way you look at things that yu see more right or wrong?Or do situations and circumstances govern the rights and wrongs?
I see my friends happily married . Are the men with them perfect or its just that they have decided to see the rights in them and ignore the wrongs? Am I am normal person or is there something wrong with me? Is it me who is the loser? Whats are the answers and what are the truths?Is there a Prince Charming ? Will I ever meet him?So many questions and no answers?
Of late there is another thing that I am feeling.I am not attracted to men, I dont want company and wanna be left alone. Thought of being with someone suffocates me... Is there something wrong or am in denial?
Questions more questions and more questions. My head is spinning........
Lets wait and watch

Life is Beautiful

We all have some friends who give us gyan all the time. They know us in a way many people dont. You wanna listen to them even if they tell you that you are the biggest fool on the earth.So like most people i also have such friends. Some people I rate high on intelligence(I mean EQ..Ahem!)
Now this person, lets say Mr X, gave me a funda that people get upset because they plan out a life,select characters and roles and expect them to behave like this. But just as you expect life, it springs SURPRISES. And now when your hero/heroine/character artists start behaving pricey and much different from the script then obviously as a creative director you would feel upset.
So what is the alternative to this problem that often leads to stress,high BP, bad mood and relationship with your characters. Well one method is to stop being a director but I guess thats easier said than done! Then maybe you should be this adjusting director who gives in to the whims and fancies to the character, but then you arent the director anyways or another way is that let the script remain the same but keep changing the cast(just like ekta kapoor serials) .Waise now that we talk about ekta kapoor,isnt life also similar to the never ending sagas of Ms kapoor. So now I know why these SOAPS never end. But yes now lets not get side tracked,getting back to the point. I think the last option is quite good.
Theek hai script is final,cast is replaceable. Is this a fine solution. I guess it is.After all noone is indispensible tabhi to when most people didnt want to act with a new actor SRK,juhi chawla did and ended up being india's biggest superstar's friend.
Moral on the story: Choose the script the actors will follow,
Golden rule:Noone is indispensible!